Rating: NC-17
Disclaimer: BtVS characters belong to Joss Whedon. Poems, mine.
Feedback: Hit me (Love tap!)
Distribution: Yes, please. Lemme know?
Lots of lovin: to PT, Cindy, Rene & Marciano. My babies. Your friendship and your humor warms my heart... and other places.
Summary: Just look at the title. Someone is Whipped. Guess who?

-Oralfxatn

Whipped

FAITH'S POV:

"Fuck you, Faith."

"No, fuck YOU, Buffy."

I climb out her window and drop to the ground.

I grab my boots and glance back up.

Fuck you, I think. You're history.

THE BEGINNING

"Well thanks, that was great. I'll see ya around," I tell the hot redhead from the Bronze.

"Are you gonna call me?" she asks, as I buckle my belt.

"Uh, sure. Gimme your number," I say. I sigh to myself.

Why are chicks always asking you that?

I swear, dudes were much better that way.

Give a little, get a little, and then you're gone.

Okay, maybe there were a few guys that wanted seconds...but I kicked them to the curb as always.
But technically, it is easier with guys. They don't get their feelings all hurt like chicks do.

Like this one.

I watch her as she frantically looks for a pen with ink.

She's on her third one.

She finally finds one, but now she can't find a piece of paper.

"Hey, look babe. Why don't you just tell me it and I'll remember."

She looks at me skeptically.

Shit.

"Uh okay, how about this?" And I hold out my hand.

She smiles at me all excited.

She grabs my right hand and turns my palm up. She starts writing.

"Okay, but don't forget to write this down somewhere before you take a shower."

"I wouldn't think of it," I say sincerely.

Yeah, wouldn't think about writing it down, that is.

She sits back on the bed and looks at me.

I know the drill.

I lean over and give her a lingering kiss.

She sighs.

"You sure you have to go?" she asks, caressing my hip.

"Yeah, sorry sweetheart. If I didn't, we'd be having another go at it."

I've already spent more time here than I expected. After the second go round, I figured I'd leave...

...but then she did that thing with her tongue.

So I decided to stick around for a while.

But now I was done.

I had places to go and people to see.

Okay, just the one place to go and the one person to see.

"Call me," she says plaintively, as I walk out the door.

Chicks, I think. Geez.

I get to Revello Drive and I scan the neighborhood. All the good Sunnydale residents tucked safely in bed.

Leaving all of the seedier elements to roam about town.

Like me.

And not that I gave a fuck about the other residents sleeping.

I only cared about one.

I walk to the tree and grab the first branch, hoisting myself up.

I swing my legs to avoid that thing that snags my pants.

Practice makes perfect.

I crawl up a ways and get myself comfortable.

I look through the window...

She's sleeping.

Aww, look at her. She's so fucking adorable.

Her head is tucked under and she's got a knuckle in her mouth...

Is it weird to envy a knuckle?

I pull out a cigarette and strike up a match. I settle back and sigh.

I've been watching Buffy sleep for over a week now.

After some post slayage action, I find it comforting to watch Buffy when she's sleeping and unguarded. It relaxes me.

And it makes me feel all soft inside...but not too soft.

Her defenses are down and she looks peaceful and content.

Oh, I know it's usually my fault she gets so defensive in the first place. I can't seem to stop myself from giving her such a hard time.

It's foreplay, really.

In a weird kinda way.

But then afterwards I go looking for sex with somebody else.

Buffy's not interested, for one, and for two, it's better for me.

I really don't like going all soft inside.

Just look at Xander and Red.

They get a little pussy from someone they care about and they're mush.

Nah, I'd rather have sex with someone I barely know, or even like for that matter.

Can't get whipped that way.

It's nice, it's uncomplicated, and it's safe.

The three basic rules for casual intimacy.

Ya can't lose your head if your heart's not in it.

I stub out my cigarette and reach for another. It's usually a three cigarette visit.

Sometimes four, if I see some skin poking out from the covers.

But she looks like she's got on some jammies tonight...

Oh.

She moved.

Fuck, are her eyes open??

I lean back into the tree and hold my breath.

Oh, fuck no.

God, don't let her see me looking like a perv all up in a tree.

Thank god her window's closed. The cigarette smoke would have given me away.

I wait a few moments and then venture a peek...

...her back is turned towards me.

Wheew.

I better cut this visit short. Yunno, just to be safe.

I hop down from the tree and head back to the redhead's place.

I'm not ready to sleep yet.

Betty.

Her name was Betty.

Well, I'm sure it still is, but she's history now.

I almost called her Buffy a couple of times and then figured calling her B would be safer.

Plus, I still got to say the name of the person I was really thinking about.

It was a lot hotter that last time around.

I head over to Giles' where the Scoobs are meeting to go over some new big bad Giles was reading about.

Buffy wanted all of us to be there, cuz she thought we should all be prepared for what might be coming.

I know it was directed at me, cuz for the most part I try to skip these types of meetings.

Bor-ing.

I mean, if the big bad was in town, sure...call me up.

But if we were just gonna sit around and discuss the possiblity of one showing up...well, I'd rather watch cartoons.

So I show up late, of course, after watching Johnny Quest, and everyone just keeps on talking.

Xander nods his hello and Buffy ignores me.

So what else is new? She likes me to work for it.

Giles gestures for me to have a seat and it's the one next to Buffy.

Oh yeah...and I was told to do it.

I lower my ass onto a chair that Buffy has a foot propped up on.

I look at her while I do it.

She's still ignoring me, but not for long...

Huh?

I'm sitting on her foot and she's still ignoring me?

Oh, okay.

Let's move this up a notch.

I spread my legs and close my thighs around her Nike. My right thigh is resting on top of her ankle, but the side of her shoe is pressed up against my crotch. I scoot the chair under the table for privacy.

Ah. Nice.

Now she's looking down at her notebook scribbling something.

I move my crotch against her shoe. I feel her leg stiffen.

I rub a little harder, expecting her to yank her foot back, but instead her leg relaxes again.

Hmm.

She slides me a note.

WHAT DID U DO LAST NITE?

No one's looking, so I take the pen from her hand.

GOT SOME.

I slide it back.

She looks at the paper for a while and then crumples it up. A second later she pulls her foot back and the toe of her shoe slides right down my pussy.

I jump.

I look at her and she's looking down with a small smile on her lips. Nice move, B. That's something I would have done.

I grin and turn my attention to Giles.

"Well, Faith, I'm sorry you were so late in joining us, but I'm sure Buffy would be glad to fill you in," He looks at Buffy.

She shrugs.

"Yeah, Faith. What took you so long? Was there anything good on TV...or on you?" Xander jokes.

Buffy is doodling, drawing little hearts with stakes in 'em.

"Nah, nuthin' like that, Xan. Just Johnny Quest."

Buffy smirks.

"Which one? Oh, I love the one when Bandit..."

Buffy slides me another piece of paper and gets up from the chair. "Sorry to interrupt you Xander, but I've got to meet my mom at the house. Faith, if you want me to fill you in on what you missed, give me a call later," She smiles at everyone and then leaves the room.

I pocket the paper and walk up to Xander.

"Wanna go get something to eat? Talk 'toons?" I ask.

"Heck yeah, Faith. But my treat this time, okay? Anya's getting her claws...I mean nails done, so she shouldn't be back for a while," He grins sheepishly.

Yeah. Anya's got him on a pretty short leash.

"Whipped," I cough into my hand.

"What's that you say?" he asks.

"Whatever you say, Xan, you pick the place."

No need to humiliate the guy. He knows what he is.

And as usual, he picks a place where I've helped myself to the help.

I swear he does it on purpose.

"What, Faith? Bad choice?" Like he doesn't know.

He watches me slouch into my chair and pull up my jacket collar.

"You like doing this to me, don't you? You're a gem of a guy."

He laughs.

"Honestly, Faith. I don't think there's a restaurant in town where you'd feel safe."

Okay, true. I do like take-out.

Can I help it if most of it's not on the menu?

So we order up and talk about 'toons. The meal went well except for the part when I bit into my burger and found a piece of paper in it.

LIAR, it said.

"What's this one say?" Xander asks. I hand it over.

"Okay, so that makes two 'Liar's and three 'Call me's in four restaurants. I'd say you were ahead of the game."

"Let's order pizza next time, okay, Xan?"

He laughs again, "Oh yeah, like that'll be any safer."

Yeah, okay. So I had a pizza delivery guy once too.

"A lot safer than this. I'll leave the tip, okay?"

"Okay," And he goes off to settle the bill.

I reach into my pocket to pull out some cash and B's note falls onto the ground.

Oh yeah. Her doodles. I open it up and it says:

C U L8TR

What? She work for the DMV now?

Besides, I thought she told me to call her?

Hell, I'm not calling. I really don't want to hear what I missed. That's the reason I showed up late in the first place.

Duh.

Xan returns and sees the note in my hand, "What? Another one?"

"Nope, just my laundry list," I say, putting the note back in my pocket.

"What's a laundry list anyway? Things you hope will get washed?" he jokes.

"You're a dork, you know that, Xan?"

"Yeah, I know," he replies, grinning.

Patrolling was uneventful.

Well, except for the part where I almost got busted.

Buffy was all quiet and the gang was too.

Okay, so not really.

Anya kept badgering Xander until he said sorry for something he never did...

...and Red and T kept acting like those cartoon gophers that I watched as a kid.

"Oh please, Tara, after you."

"Ooh, no...no Willow, after you."

Whipped. All of 'em.

I don't care what you say...

...no pussy is that good.

Buffy was leading the pack, and as usual, I was bringing up the rear.

It made sense, really. It was safer for everyone that way.

And the view wasn't bad either.

I always walked a little to the side so I could get a good look at Buffy's ass.

It's such a great ass. All round and tight and full of mystery.

The Case of The Hot Slayer's Ass. A new Nancy Drew Mystery.

Yeah, I'd like to crack that one wide open.

In fact, her crack is where I'd-

Oomph!

"Oow."

"Oh shit, I'm sorry, T."

"Baby, did Faith hurt you?" Willow asks, touching Tara's head gently, worry on her face.

"Yeah, T, did I hurt you?" She shakes her head, rubbing it.

"Faith, we were right in front of you. Weren't you looking?" Red admonishes.

"Sure she was, Will. But you aren't asking the right question. Where was she looking is more like it," Xander says grinning.

I narrow my eyes at him. He laughs.

"Oh! Now I get it. I always wondered why she walked behind us. 'It's safer this way' made sense, but her adoring my ass makes more," says Anya, admiring her ass over her shoulder.

"Uh, no, An-" Xander says, but I cut him off.

"Yeah, okay, ya caught me. You've got a great ass, Anya. You work out?"

And now everyone is staring at Anya's ass.

She couldn't be more pleased.

"Not lately, Faith, but my demon days kept me pretty active. I guess it carried over."

I smile, nodding my head, and shoot Xander a warning look. He nods back in acknowledgment.

He's not stupid. He's a horn dog himself.

We understand each other.

I glance over at Buffy and she has that same small smile on her lips.

Great.

"You can touch it, if you like," Anya says, offering me her butt.

Buffy and I both raise our eyebrows.

"Uh...well..." I hedge, looking at Xander.

"Anya, what did I tell you about offering people to feel your ass?" Xander whispers loudly, walking and pulling on her arm.

"But those were strangers, we know Faith," she protests, being dragged off.

Red puts her arm around Tara.

"Come on, baby. Let's go home so I can kiss it and make it better."

"Okay, Willow," Tara smiles sweetly.

I raise my eyebrow.

Willow looks at me, " 'It' meaning head, Faith."

And now I'm grinning.

"Oh my goddess, Faith. Kiss her head. Not...not give her head," Red stammers, blushing.

T just smiles. She likes when I give Red a hard time.

"Oh. Well that's too bad. Sorry, T," I say, wiggling my eyebrows.

Buffy laughs and walks over, taking my arm.

"Leave the girls alone, Faith. Come on, let's go back to mine and we'll take care of that lip."

Oh yeah. My lip.

"Ya gonna kiss 'it' and make it better?" I joke.

"You never know," she says mysteriously.

We get back to B's house and I glance at the tree.

Nope, not tonight, my friend. I'm going in this time.

"Whatcha looking at, Faith?" Buffy asks.

"Oh nothing, B. I thought I saw something in the tree."

"Oh, I know. I thought I've seen something too."

What?

"When, B? Just now?"

"No, just lately. I think a family of squirrels moved in."

Wheew.

"Aww, that's kind of cute, B."

She smiles.

"Yeah, it is, isn't it?"

And she gives me a look...

...nah, I'm just being paranoid.

So we go inside and she takes me in her room.

"I can close the door this way and not wake up mom," she explains.

Cool.

"Are you hungry? Can I get you something to eat?"

"Whatcha got?"

"Well, I can make popcorn or look for leftovers."

"Nah, that's okay. I can get something when I leave."

She looks disappointed.

"Uh, but popcorn does sound good, B."

She smiles, "Okay. I'll see what else I can find. Then we'll take care of that lip, okay?"

"Sure, B. That would be nice," She's just so fucking adorable.

I smile at her as she shuts the door...

...and sigh.

This isn't good.

I already feel whipped and I haven't gotten any pussy. Is that even possible?

No, Faith, it's not.

That's why it's called Pussy Whipped. There is no pussy, so you are not whipped.

You're good.

Feeling better with that reasoning, I decide to snoop a little.

What does little Buffy have here, I think, as I open a drawer.

PJ's. Socks. Underwear...

Hmm. Nice.

No...SEXY.

Oh my god, she wears this stuff??

Fuck.

I did NOT need to know that.

Hmm.

I wonder if she'd miss a pair...

What if...

What if what? If you took a pair??

Jesus Christ, Faith, you are not a pervert...

...I see the tree through the window and it's mocking me.

Well, I may be a perv, but I'm not a psycho...

Okay, so maybe I was, but I'm not anymore!

Okay, Faith. Put the panties back and step away from the drawer.

I raise my hands and slowly back up.

Man, I need to snap out of it.

I close my eyes and grit my teeth. I shake my head.

Okay, better.

So what else she got?

I go through her closet.

Boring. Boring. Dull, really boring. Butt ugly...and oh, what's this?

Leather?

Heeey, that's my jacket! I wondered where it was!

I used to wear this all the time. It's my favorite. I take it out to put it on, but then I catch Buffy's scent on it. She's been wearing it? When? I've never seen her wear it.

But I can sure picture her in it.

I kinda like the idea, so I put it back.

I walk over to her nightstand and look at the pictures.

Xander. Red. Joyce. One with Buffy grinning, alone, with her arm around nothing...oh, must be Angel.

That's funny!

What a goof. I can't believe she took that.

God, she's great. I look further. Pencils, pens, knick-knacks.

Nothing juicy. I look at the bed.

A quilt. Pillows, a throw; Mr. Gordo with a tiny party hat on.

Hmm. What's this?

Notebook paper under one of her pillows.

A poem.

FANTASY

You steal into my room
within the middle of the night

Softly we make love
before the early morning light

Safe within the darkness
is the warmth of your embrace

Gentle is the moonlight
casting shadows on your face

A smiling heart within my breast
as sleep descends our eyes

Knowing you'll be gone before
the sunlight streaks the sky

As I awake the night before
comes racing through my mind

Enveloped by the lingering scent
that you had left behind

As I arise to start the day
I'm secure that there will be

Another time that you'll come back
to steal the night with me

--- B. Summers 4/14

Oh my god, she wrote that? 4/14? That was yesterday!

What the FUCK is going on?

Is Angel back?

I did see her drawing little hearts with stakes in 'em.

Or were they arrows?

Oh god, no, not Angel.

Not AGAIN. I shuffle through the papers and I see more doodling, more hearts.

Oh my god.

And then I see a Polaroid.

Of me.

Of me wearing my favorite leather jacket that is now hanging in Buffy's closet.

From years ago.

I remember being a smart-ass about it and giving it to her.

We had just come back from the fair and it was cold and I had given her my jacket to wear. When we got to her house, she didn't want to give it up.

I figured that would happen, so while we were at the fair I had paid someone to take a picture of me with their camera.

"But it's so nice and warm, Faith. Can't I give it back to you tomorrow?"

"Buffy, you've been wearing it all night. It needs to come home with me. But here, maybe this will help."

And I handed her the picture.

Before taking the picture, I had shook my hair and bitten my lower lip, making it fuller.

I looked damned hot and I wanted her to think about me. But I didn't want to make it obvious, so I made a joke of it.

"Here. Keep this under your pillow, and if you need something warm to snuggle up with, you can always remember this jacket...or me, if you want to get even warmer."

I guess she did.

Oh my god. That poem.

Did she see me in the tree?

Were her eyes really open?

Is this for me?

And I quickly read it again.

Holy shit.

I suddenly hear B coming up the stairs and I quickly shove the papers and photo under her pillow. I jump on the bed and lean back against the headboard; my legs stretched out and my ankles crossed.

I clasp my hands behind my head and smile as she opens the door.

"Damn, what took you so long, B?" I ask casually, as my heart pounded heavily.

She looks apologetic. And a little embarrassed.

"How many bags did you pop? Twenty?" My heart is still pounding.

"Um, no. It's not microwave, I made it the old fashioned way."

"How's that, B? You throw an ear of corn into a campfire?"

"No, not that old fashioned, wise guy. In a pan, with oil."

"Really, B? I've never had it that way. Before microwave I had JiffyPop."

"I know. That's what I figured, I mean. So I wanted to make it the real way for you, minus the campfire."

"Aww, B. You shouldn't have gone through the trouble."

"It was no trouble. But I did kind of burn it. It's been a while since I made it that way."

"That's cool, B. I'm sure I'll love it."

She smiles at me.

Oh god. Pang!

She hands me the bowl and I almost pass out.

She didn't kind of burn it. It was scorched.

I musta made a face cuz she says:

"You don't have to eat it."

"Oh. No, B. I like things blackened. Cajun popcorn. It's gourmet."

She smiles again.

"Um, do you think I can have a glass, I mean two glasses of water?"

"Two?" She raises a brow.

"Um, yeah, two. I was already thirsty before we got here and now I'm even thirstier."

"Okay. I'll go get your water and the first-aid kit and be right back."

She shuts the door.

I think she really did make this in a campfire.

It's like charcoal.

But she made it for me, so I better start eating.

Yunno, test the gag reflexes before she comes back.

I put one in my mouth. Okay, not so bad.

I put a handful in my mouth and start coughing.

No WAY this is edible!

But she made it for me, so I better start eating.

I swallow and throw another handful in my mouth.

Same thing. Except now I'm choking.

I swallow.

Ah god.

I'll promise to be good, just please let me finish.

And now I'm coughing again, cus my throat's too dry to laugh.

I'll be good?...who was I kidding?

No, I was on my own here.

I put two handfuls in my mouth and try to keep it down. I mean, she made it for me, so I better keep eating.

I finally make it to the kernels on the bottom. They're black too.

She's got talent, all right.

Homemade popcorn just isn't one of them.

She kicks softly at the door and I spring up to open it.

I snatch both glasses out of her hands and leave the first-aid kit tucked under her arm.

I guzzle. One...

...and now two.

Aaaaahhhhhhgggggh.

"Faith, you got it all over your shirt."

"That's okay, B. It was worth it. I was really thirsty," I gasp.

She looks at the empty popcorn bowl and smiles, happy.

"You finished already? Here, take the kit and I'll make you some more."

"NO!" It just slipped out.

She looks at me.

"Uh, I mean, no thanks, B. The salt from the popcorn kinda hurt my lip more, can we just fix it now?"

She looks at my lip.

"You're right, it's more swollen. I'll get a wash cloth."

No, it's not more swollen, it's jam packed with charcoal.

She returns and leads me to sit on the bed.

"You should take that shirt off, Faith. It's soaked."

"Okay."

Me? Shirtless in Buffy's bedroom?

What...do you think I'm an idiot?

Of course I'll take it off.

So I take off my shirt and I grin at her.

Got my sexy red bra on. I usually wear black, but I was feeling extra pluckish tonight. I'm glad I wore it.

She looks at my breasts and then quickly looks back at my...

forehead.

Over compensate, much?

"I know girls usually say, 'my eyes are higher', but in this case, B, they're actually lower."

She blushes a little.

"I know where your eyes are, Faith. I was looking at that lump on your head."

Lump on my head? I do?

"Where?" I ask.

"There," And she smacks me hard on my forehead.

"Oow," I laugh, putting my hand to it, "What was that for, B?"

"Oh, I think you know," she answers, opening the first-aid kit, "Here, now hold this and hold still," She hands me a tube of ointment.

She nudges my legs open and stands in between them.

I'm holding one hand to my forehead and the other is holding the salve.

I look up at her.

She bends down a bit and I can feel her breath on my face.

"It might sting a little, but I have to rub some of this...soot out."

Soot, charcoal...whatever, but it sure wasn't popcorn.

She lifts my chin and cups it in one hand. She takes her other one and gently runs it across my mouth. I part my lips and let her fix me.

Her breath is warm against my face. It smells sweet.

She leans in a little closer and then her lips part too.

Oh man, I so wanna kiss her right now!

But I close my eyes instead.

She runs the cloth a few more times on my lip and then dabs at it.

She pulls her hand back from my mouth and she whispers:

"All done."

And I open my eyes to a pool of green.

We're both quiet.

She's looking so deep into my eyes, that I feel myself getting sucked in...but I don't mind drowning.

A whimper.

Who whimpered?

Her tongue wets her lips and she gives a soft smile.

Another whimper.

Oh fuck, is that me? What's happening??

She takes her hand from my chin, pulling away slowly, and says:

"Hand me the ointment."

The what?

"The ointment," she says again.

Who?

She laughs softly and takes something from my hand.

She does something with her fingers, I don't know what, but now she's touching me.

I close my eyes again and feel her finger run over my lip.

It feels so soft.

My tongue slips out to touch it.

"Isn't that icky?" she asks softly.

Hickey?

"Icky. Isn't...that...icky?" she repeats slowly.

What is she saying?

Oh.

I wiggle my ass a little.

"Uh yeah, I'm sticky."

She laughs.

"No, not 'sticky'," she says.

" 'No, not sticky'..." I echo. "...wet?"

"Faith."

"Yeah, baby?" Silence.

What's that?

What's that ba...

"B-B! What's that, B-B?" I shout as my eyes fly open.

"Oh my god, Faith. Don't shout, my mom is sleeping."

Oh my god, I'm so embarrassed. I called her baby!

Fuck.

"Oh, sorry B-B," I say collecting myself.

"B-B? Since when did you start calling me that?" she asks.

"Since right now. Since you're being doubly nice to me and all, I thought I'd say your name twice."

She buys this, but she looks sort of disappointed.

"Oh," she says.

"Thanks for fixing my busted lip, B-B...and the popcorn. But I think I'd better get going," I go to reach for my wet shirt, but she grabs it.

"Wait. It's cool out and you don't want to catch a chill. I'll just put this in the dryer for a few, and then it'll be better."

"No, that's okay, B. I mean, B-B. Cuz then I'd have to call you B-B-B," I joke.

"No you won't. I'll be right back," And she takes my shirt and shuts the door behind her.

Wow.

Can you believe this?

I can't.

I reach under her pillow and look at the photo again.

We sure had some fun that night.

B ate so much cotton candy that she almost puked on the Ferris wheel.

She was wearing a pastel colored sweater when I had picked her up, so I knew I'd be offering her my jacket later.

I had heard that she had held on to Angel's for a while, so I had someone snap a picture of me when she had gone into the bathroom. In case she did the same thing with me. Cuz I knew that she would.

Well, she'd try, anyway.

We were at the top of the Ferris wheel and our cart was rocking back and forth.

I saw her shiver and I made my move. I took off my jacket and gave it to her.

"Here, B. I'm not cold. I'm pretty warm blooded," And after she slipped it on I took her cold hands into mine.

"See? Nice and warm," And she let me rub her hands, warming them.

After a while she said:

"You have to be cold, Faith. I feel bad. Come here."

And she put her arm around me, pulling me close and rubbing my arm.

And I felt like I was her chick.

No guy or girl had ever made me feel that way. Not before, or since that night.

But here was this petite, tiny, feminine thing wearing my butch leather jacket, which only made her look even tinier.

But I felt like her girl. She made me feel like I was her girl.

At that time I was still only crushin' on her, and well...I loved my jacket.

So even though she made me feel something I never had before, I still wanted it back.

But she can have it now.

She can have it now, cuz now it's not some stupid jacket that I love.

I may have loved it, but it never made me wet when it touched my skin or my heart pang when I looked at it.

Oh fuck.

This is not good.

I'm in her room, in my bra, on the bed, with a love poem under her pillow.

I'm looking at a picture of a time we shared before it all went bad.

And I remember how I happy I felt.

So happy to be alive, on a Ferris wheel, on a winter's night, with a beautiful blonde, overlooking the twinkling lights of Sunnydale...

Until I remembered she was a girl; that we were both girls, and that she could never want me like that.

So I started rocking the cart, making her mad, and almost making her hurl. But it did the trick.

It brought me back to reality, and I let it go, deciding instead to just keep it simple.

Flirt a little, give her a hard time, and be a wise guy.

Just like now. I have to keep it simple.

And if I get lucky somehow, and she gave me some?

Well, you can't lose your head if your heart's not in it.

No, not me. I'll never be whipped.

BUFFY'S POV:

I want her to stay.

I want her to stay and spend the night with me.

And she's going to.

I walk to the sink that's next to the washer and I turn on the tap. I hold Faith's shirt under the running water.

There.

That'll take a while for it to dry.

I wring it lightly before sticking it in the machine. I put the setting on cool/low air. I hit start.

I've been out of my mind since she showed up late last night.

She had been coming to my house for at least a week and watching me sleep from the tree.

I say at least a week, because that's the first time I saw her. She could have been coming longer.

What was different that night was I had left the window open just a crack. It was cold out, but I had wanted a little fresh air.

The smoke from her cigarette had woken me up. She was smoking her cloves that night.

She doesn't always smoke them, but still it's a smell that I associate with her.

Repulsive, and yet still so sweet at the same time.

A little like her.

It probably should have freaked me out, seeing Faith in a tree in the middle of the night, watching me. But it didn't.

It brought me comfort. It felt like she had finally come home.

I've been waiting for her for such a long time.

Even before she went psycho and left on the lam.

But she was so young then. So was I, and although I was older, she had seemed more experienced and so self-assured. I couldn't have been more wrong. But I didn't know that then, and by the time I did, it had been too late.

Words had been said that had changed things. Events then took place that would change things. And then blame had been passed and it changed things.

Except for one. And it never changed.

I still loved her.

When she came back this time, I was too scared to hope. Our track record wasn't a good one. But over some time, and Giles' gentle encouragement, we started to spend more time together. The gang even learned to accept and enjoy her.

But still I was too scared to hope.

To hope for what, you ask? Well, I'll tell you.

For another perfect moment like that night on the Ferris wheel.

I'm not being a silly girl. A hopeless romantic, maybe. I'll admit to that.

But I've never had a more perfectly sweet moment than that night at the fair.

And it was all too brief.

The lights of city and the warmth of her jacket and the heat that was coming off of the body that it belonged to... next to me, curled up under my arm.

It was the first real time I saw Faith as the young innocent girl that she was.

Oh, she may have known things and she may have done things, but that didn't change her true nature. It just covered it up. But when she took off that jacket, she did much more than just remove clothing. She bared her soul to me.

And I fell in love with her in that instant.

She let me hold her and it felt so perfect. We were perfect. Life was perfect.

And I knew she thought so too.

But something changed and suddenly she was acting like a wise guy again; rocking the cart and almost making me sick. She had left the perfect moment and I was alone. She ran away and made me wonder if I had imagined the whole thing. But I knew I hadn't. She had felt it too and for whatever reason didn't want it.

Or she didn't want me.

So when she gave me that snapshot of her in the jacket, I took it.

I had wanted the jacket to remind me of our moment and because of the scent that clung onto it.

Her cloves and cologne.

But the picture was just as good. It was actually better. I could see her beautiful face every time I looked at it.

And I've looked at it a hundred times.

At first I hid it in my nightstand drawer. But I got tired of turning on the light and looking for it. So then I kept it under my pillow with a penlight.

When things started to change for us, it pained me to look at it, so it was moved to my underwear drawer. Then that became too much and was moved again to an old shoebox in my closet.

Out of sight, out of mind.

But not really. I had to go inside my closet every day, and it was always the first thing I thought of before I opened it:

Faith.

And then I'd open the door and look for something to wear.

When she came back this time, it had found its way under my pillow again.

I saw her every day, so what was the point of putting it away?

So when she started coming at night to watch me, I would wait up until she showed. She never stayed long and I wondered where she went afterwards or where she had come from. But I didn't really want to know.

I could only assume. Faith is still Faith. Some things don't change.

But last night was unbearable.

She usually shows up around the same time each night, give or take a half hour. But last night she was very late. I didn't think she was coming at all. Or maybe she was coming, and that's why she was so late.

I had tossed and turned and almost pulled all the covers from my bed.

Where was she, and what was she doing? She should be here with me. Not with some whore, not in a tree. But right here with me, in bed.

And I began to fantasize on just that. I tried to make it believable so I could pretend it could really happen. No Pirate Faith with a patch on one eye or a Zorro Faith in a mask and a cape.

Well, not this time anyway. But those two are my favorites.

No, this time it had to seem real.

Something she'd do and I'd let happen.

So I started thinking. And then thoughts became words, and words became sentences, and soon I was writing it down beneath my covers with a penlight. It became a poem, and it was very realistic.

And I wanted it to happen.

When I finally fell asleep, I dreamt of her.

She had climbed up onto the roof, and okay, she had a mask and cape on, but she had quietly climbed through the window and stood looking over me. She saw that I was awake and she came onto the bed and made love to me.

I don't remember the details, I'm not sure if there even were any, but the feeling I had was perfect.

It was perfect, we were perfect, life was perfect.

I woke up just as Zorro Faith was climbing out of my window.

I was still half asleep, and I thought I was watching the back of her black silk cape going out the window, but it was Real Faith in her black leather jacket in the tree.

Not the brown leather jacket that I have hidden in my wardrobe.

Shortly after her picture found its way back under my pillow, I had managed to find a new home for her jacket in my closet.

She had left it at Giles', and well...

Finders keepers. Losers weepers.

It was mine now, and I'll never give it back to her.

I don't care how good she looks in it.

But now she is upstairs in her sexy red bra, and I'm not letting her out of this house. And not after she told me why she was so late last night:

"GOT SOME"

Maybe she can't fulfill my poem's fantasy, but I'll have her warm body next to mine.

I walk to the dryer and hit stop. Just in case.

No, she's not leaving.

I enter my room and Faith is standing by the window. She's looking out into the night and she's running a hand through her hair.

I look at her strong back and tapered waist and notice how sexy her butt looks in those jeans...

...and I miss her.

Is it possible to miss someone who is standing right in front of you?

Yes. It is.

She hears me close the door and turns to look at me, her fingers still running through her hair. She looks troubled.

"What's wrong, Faith?" I ask.

"Um, nothing, B. Just a little tired, I guess. And my back's sore."

"What happened to your back?" I ask concerned.

"I dunno. Pulled it, I guess."

I look closer and see a slight swelling by her waistband.

I walk over and touch it lightly. She stiffens.

"Does it hurt to touch it?" I ask, pulling my hand back.

"Uh...no, B. It actually feels kinda nice."

"Want me to rub it?"

She grins.

"Rub 'it', B?"

If you'll let me, I think. But I roll my eyes and say:

"Your back, Faith. Not 'it'."

"Oh. Well, that's too bad. But that sounds nice too, B," she smiles.

She lets me lead her by her fingers to the bed; she lets go, sliding onto her stomach, with her boots hanging off the edge.

"You got any tunes, B?" she asks, her voice muffled by the mattress.

"Sure, what do you want?" I ask walking to my boom-box.

"Oh, I dunno. Something sexy, yunno, to put you in the mood."

Like I need music to put me in the mood. Faith on my bed, Hello!

"Hmm. I think I loaned all my 'back-rubbing' mood music to Willow and Tara," I tell her.

"Oh, well, surprise me then," she muffles.

So I put on some Enigma...tracks two, three, and four.

Okay, cliché for seduction, but I'm hoping she doesn't know that.

"Hey, that's nice, B. I never knew monks chanting could sound so sexy."

I adjust the volume so mom won't hear and put it on repeat. I lock the door.

What?

I click on the bedside lamp and throw a multi-colored scarf over it. I turn out the overhead light. Perfect.

Faith lifts her head and looks at me through her hair.

"Whooa, B. You re-thinkin' the rubbing 'it' thing?"

"You wish," I tell her.

Silence.

I walk to the edge and start pulling off her boots.

"Uh... whatcha doin' there, Buffy?" Faith muffles.

"Well, if you want me to rub it, I have to take your pants off," I smile.

Silence.

"Your back, Faith. It looks like it goes below your waistband."

More silence.

"Faith?" I say, as the other boot comes off.

"Uh, okay," she says.

I tug on her pant legs. She lies still.

"Unzip your pants, Faith."

Oh god, did I just say that? That just sounds so hot!

She slides her hand under her stomach and lifts up her ass. She brings her hand back to lie at her side.

She's quiet.

I tug on her pant legs and it moves a fraction. Her zipper's caught.

"Faith?" No answer.

"Faith?" Nothing.

I crawl onto the bed and kneel over her, a knee between her thighs. I reach under with my hand, pulling at her zipper.

She's as stiff as a board.

I slide my hand back up over her stomach, then over her hips, tugging.

She lifts her ass, and with both hands, I pull.

Oh god...

Why isn't she wearing any panties?

Why?? To torture me??

"Uh, B...You wanna get my underwear for me? I think they're in my pants."

Oh.

"Sorry," I say. She reaches behind with her hands and pulls them back up.

Okay, a little better.

But not much.

I move my hands to rub her muscle. I rub it tenderly.

"Uhh...that feels nice, B."

"Sssh, no talking," I whisper.

"Okay," she whispers back.

Oh my god. Look at her. She's so sexy in her red lingerie.

"You have a nice touch, B."

"Ssshh..." I say. "...but, thank you."

I work on her pulled muscle and then start massaging around it. I move up toward her shoulders, her neck, and then back down to her hips.

She lets out a low moan.

I knead her slowly, moving lower each time. I massage her ass through her red panties.

I continue and move down to the back of her thighs, to her calves and then work up again. To her ass, her hips, back, shoulders and neck.

I work back down again.

I do this over and over and over again, until I hear her soft breathing become slow and regulated.

She's sleeping...

...and she's mine.

FAITH'S POV:

Mmmmm.

Buffy Sex Fantasy #26: Masturbating myself with Buffy's hand while she lies sleeping.

Haven't thought of that one in a while.

But it's a good one.

I musta fallen asleep on my hand or something, cuz I can feel it against my pussy but my fingers ain't moving.

Oh, no...there they go.

See? Right there, scratching your nose...

What??

I open my eyes to the sight of golden hair.

Where am I??

Fuck, I never spend the night at some trick's place. And I musta got some, cuz I feel so relaxed.

Musta been so damn good, it knocked me out after.

Too bad I can't remember.

And who is this chick?

The only blonde I know who-

Buffy???

I turn my head to look at my surroundings.

Yep, B's bedroom.

What happened?

And why is her hand between my legs???

Did she give me some? I do feel really relaxed. Wait, she gave me some, and I can't remember it???

Oh, fuck no, Faith. You fucking loser.

I stare at the back of her head and move back a little.

Her arm is down behind her and her hand tucked firmly between my legs.

I wonder how long it's been there, and how long I've been rubbing on it?

Oh man. She's gonna wake up and have a wet finger. Or two.

Nah, the whole damn hand is gonna be wet, cuz now I'm really turned on!

Oh.

What's that I feel? Buffy's hand is moving?

Does she think she's touching herself?

Oh, that feels nice.

Buffy Sex Fantasy #26 in progress, folks.

I bite my lip to keep from moaning.

Oh man, please don't wake up yet...come on...a little more...a little more...

Man, my panties are soaked, I can smell it!

I can smell it and...the shampoo from her hair.

The shampoo from her hair and my pussy scent mixed together...

I never thought I'd smell those two things at the same time...

Uh...uh...oh. Man, this is better...than...I...oh...oh...oh...oh...oh

Uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Uhhh.

Hooooooooo!

Oh my god, did that just happen?

I guess it did.

Damn, I'm sleepy.

I inch closer to her and bring my nose to her hair.

I inhale softly.

And a calm creeps over me like never before.

I drape my arm around her and sigh...

...and feel myself drift gently back to sleep.

BUFFY'S POV:

Ohhhhhhhhh...ohh...ohh...oh god...ohhhhhhh...

...hmmmmmmmm.

That was close.

Faith never woke up even a little the other two times when I touched her.

Or touched myself.

God that was sexy.

I wonder what she thought when she found my hand between her legs?

She probably thought it was an accident and that she's getting away with something.

Fine by me. Cuz now she's got her arm around me.

Third time's a charm.

I pull my hand out slowly from between her thighs and reach behind to gently pull her closer to me. I take her hand and nestle it firmly between my breasts.

Finally...I can sleep now.

FAITH'S POV:

I wake up to the smell of coffee and burnt toast.

"Dammit!" I hear B's voice from downstairs.

Her bedroom door is wide open and I'm on top of the covers in my underwear.

Great. I bet Joyce had a real good time with that sight.

Man, do I feel sticky. Did I start?

Ohhhhh.

Fuck yeah. Buffy got me off while she was sleepin'!

Little Buffy Summers givin' Faith the old touch-n-feel.

She's probably freaking out, cuz she's got pussy on her fingers.

My pussy.

Heh heh.

I'm hungry.

So hungry in fact, I'd take a tub of that popcorn she made me.

I look at the clock. Okay, Joyce must be at work by now.

Let's go eat.

I look around for something to put on, when Buffy comes up the stairs with a tray in her hands and a smile on her face.

Pang.

"Hey bedhead, I made you breakfast," she says.

"Oh hey, B. That was nice of you. Um, what happened, did I pass out on you or something?"

"Something like that. You said you were tired and I guess the massage put you to sleep," she smiles, putting the tray on the bed.

"That musta been some kick-ass massage, B. I feel really relaxed."

"Yeah, you seemed to like it," she says with that small smile again.

Hmm.

"So how about you? Did you sleep okay with me in the bed? Sorry if I snored or took all the covers," I say, looking at her.

"No, not at all. I slept fine, and you kick off all of the covers."

"I do?" I grin sheepishly.

"Yep. I'm sure you've heard that before," she says looking away.

"No, can't say as I have," I tell her.

"Oh? What about the second part of H & H ?" she asks, now looking at me.

"What about it?"

"Don't they complain, or haven't you been getting any?"

"I never spend the night, B, and yeah, I'm still gettin' some. I told you yesterday, remember?"

"That's right, you did," she says, looking away again.

"Um, is my shirt dry?" I ask.

"No, it must have shut off in the middle of the night. I just turned it back on. Now get back in bed and eat your breakfast."

I smile, "Okay." I say, and slide back under the covers.

She comes to the side of the bed and places the tray across my lap. She sits next to me.

She takes a cloth napkin and places it on my chest. It slides off.

I grin.

"Was that to catch crumbs or to cover the girls?" I ask.

She blushes.

"Neither. For the drool, wise-ass," she deadpans.

"That's cuz you look so good in the morning, B. You make my mouth water."

"Eat, Faith."

I smile and look at the tray in front of me.

Wow. It looks really good.

Toast, not burnt, bacon, eggs, potatoes and fruit.

And a thin vase with a rose in it.

"Damn, B. Is your mom home, still? I hope she didn't freak out when she saw me almost naked sleepin' in your bed."

She looks offended.

"She didn't see you, she left early this morning. I made the breakfast."

I raise my eyebrow.

I hold the toast up to check the other side. Nope, not burnt.

She looks at me.

"Uh, no, B. It's just I heard you cursin' in the kitchen and I thought I smelled burnt toast."

"No, that was a pot-holder that caught on fire and I burned my finger."

She holds it up.

"Aww, B. When you were cookin' for me? Here, let me kiss 'it' and make it better."

She lets me take her hand and place a kiss on her finger.

She smiles at me.

"Oh!" she says, jumping from the bed, "Your coffee and juice!"

And she runs down the stairs.

Okay, now this was livin'.

I got me a hot blonde, gettin' me off and gettin' me food and feedin' it to me in her bed.

I could put up with that.

I rub my hands together and dig in.

Fuck, this is really good. She really does have talent.

I think about her hand between my legs...

Hell yeah, she does.

She comes back upstairs while I munch on the toast and cram a piece of bacon in my mouth. I nod my head and smile at her, chewing.

"You like?" she asks, putting the juice and the coffee down.

I grunt and keep eating.

She sits next to me again, careful not to spill the liquids, and then takes a piece of bacon and looks at me.

I nod my head, okay. Sure have a piece, have six, I think she cooked me a pound of it.

I swallow and then take a drink of juice.

"This is fucking great, B. Thank you. Did you eat yet?"

"No, that's okay, I'll get something later."

"No way, Buffy. Come here, slide your ass next to me and eat some of this," I say, patting the bed beside me.

"Okay," she smiles at me.

I lift the covers so she can slide in next to me; I lift the tray.

She leans back against the pillows.

I put another piece of bacon in my mouth and I take the napkin from my lap and tuck it in her shirt.

She smiles at me.

Pang.

She takes the piece of bacon that's hanging out of my mouth and eats it.

I swallow.

"We can share what's on the plate, B. You don't gotta take the food outta my mouth," I tease her.

She takes what's left in her hand and puts it back in my mouth.

She wipes a crumb off my lip.

"Your lip looks better. Does it feel better?" she says, running her finger lightly across it.

"Yeah, B. Everything feels better. My lip feels better, my back feels better, my...everything feels better," I catch myself.

"Everything?" she asks softly.

"Uh, yeah. I should spend the night more often," I joke.

"Maybe you should," she says, just as softly.

I get nervous.

I shove some toast in my mouth.

She looks at me.

Okay. I take a piece of toast and pile some eggs and bacon on it. I hold my other hand under it as I bring it to her lips.

She looks at me as she opens her mouth; I feed it to her slowly.

A piece of egg falls off the toast and lands on her napkin. I reach to wipe it off and my hand is shaking.

My hand is shaking?

"What's wrong, Faith? Why is your hand shaking?" Buffy asks quietly.

"Caffeine, B. I need some."

I grab the mug and bring it to my lips, steadying my hand.

I gulp.

"Faith, be careful, it's hot!"

No shit, it is!

I quickly put it down and grab the juice. I gulp, spilling it on my chest and stomach.

She looks at me.

"Well, at least it's not on your shirt. Maybe that's how you should drink all of your beverages from now on. Shirtless."

I grin.

"No problem, B. How about you?" And I spill a little juice on her napkin, watching it soak through.

"Faith! You're the one with the drinking problem, not me!"

I spill some more on her.

"No, B. Really, it's no problem."

She looks a little annoyed with me and I grin wider.

And then she takes her shirt off.

What the fuck?? That wasn't supposed to happen!

My eyes go wide as I stare at her breasts.

Her breasts, in the bed, next to me, and next to mine.

"What, Faith? They're just breasts," she says sarcastically.

"Yeah, B, but they're yours," I tell her.

"Yes, and those are yours," she says, looking at mine.

She's looking at my tits and she's not even looking away.

Okay, what about that lump on my forehead?

"What about that lump on my forehead?" I ask.

"It's gone," she says.

"Well, you have one on yours," I say, as I reach up to smack her.

She grabs my hand and laughs.

"Eat your breakfast, you retard. It's almost cold."

Me and Buffy, shirtless, eating breakfast in her bed.

Am I dead?

Uh, yeah. I really am.

"I think I'll go see if my shirt is dry now," I say, lifting up the tray.

I put it on her lap and get out of bed, not looking at her.

I feel so fucking naked. Where are my pants? Oh, there.

I yank on my jeans, she had left my socks on, and sit down to pull up my boots.

She looks at me as she eats another piece of bacon.

That fucking little smile on her lips again.

"Okay. You need me to go get it for you?" she asks sweetly.

"No, B. I know where the laundry room is. Uh, thanks for everything, okay?"

"Okay. I'll see you later for patrol then?" she asks.

"Sure. What, no meeting today?"

"Nope. It's a free day, just patrol."

"Oh, okay. Sure, see ya later then," I go to walk out the room.

"What? No kiss on the cheek? After I made you breakfast in bed and made...everything...feel better?" she says to my back.

I scowl and walk back to the bed.

She offers me her cheek and I kiss it, she smiles and sticks a piece of bacon in my mouth.

"Don't want you complaining I left you...unsatisfied," she explains.

I give her one last look and then run down the stairs.

She's gettin' too good at this.

Since it was a "free day", I decided to go for a run.

After I left Buffy's place, I swung by the motel to change my clothes and find some old running shoes. I don't really do it that often, but I figured I needed to do something to keep myself occupied.

It would be hours before I saw Buffy again.

I realized I could still have been there, almost naked, with B, in the bed, eating breakfast.

But I also realized that the fact I wanted to be there so much was the reason why I shouldn't.

It's getting kinda tricky.

Yeah, a long run should clear my head up too.

So I throw on some shorts, slip on some shoes, and I hit the pavement. I start out slow and then pick up the pace. I'm moving at a fairly fast clip.

I run through the park. I run by the lake. I run across UC Sunny D. I run past a group of whistling jock-heads...I slow down to jog backwards by the girl's cheerleading squad. Hey, Chinese splits. Nice. I think I know that girl. I look closer. Long legs, blonde, nice rack...yep, I do. I wink as she waves at me.

"FAITH! Wait!" she yells.

Oops. No can do...I turn around and keep running. I'm running so much I feel like I'm Forrest fucking Gump...

...and I'm running from my Jenny.

I head back to the motel.

I throw my sticky self onto the bed. I'll shower later.

Me and B.

Just like carrots and peas...

Fuck it. I always did play with my vegetables.

That fucking little smile.

Look at her, all smug-like and pleased with herself...

Like she beat me or something. Well, think again, little girl.

Okay, sure. She surprised me a few times. I can admit that.

Taking my pants off and taking off her shirt.

And what's with the Enigma shit?

Not that I really needed it, but I used that myself one time to get some chick into the sack.

Just who does she think she's dealing with? I'm Faith, for god's sake.

Besides, I'm not the one with some love poem tucked under my pillow, and it wasn't my hand between her legs.

And the fact that B masturbates still kills me. Oh, okay, it turns me on. But that she'd do it while I was sleepin' in the bed with her?

Or maybe she forgot I was there....

Naaaaah.

Okay, ready for round two...

Ding!

I lose my usual position in the rear and move past the gang to walk next to Buffy. She's up front...as usual.

Anya looks a little miffed, having worn some butt-hugging jeans for my benefit.

I toss her a bone.

"Nice ass," I say over my shoulder. She beams at me.

"Hey, 'B-B'," I grin at Buffy, bumping her with my hip.

"Hey, 'F-F'. What are you doing here? You know it's safer if one of us watches the rear."

I wind up and throw my first punch. I say:

"Yeah, I know. But lookin' at Anya's ass is getting me wicked horny and stuff, so I thought maybe you and I could switch for a while."

"Oh?" she says, glancing back at Anya.

"So whadda ya say, B? Is that cool?"

She looks pretty annoyed.

"Yeah, okay," she says finally.

"Thanks, B, You're a life saver," I joke. "Maybe that way I won't get so distracted."

She gives a tight smile, "Happy to help," she says.

We trade positions.

Anya seemed momentarily perplexed, confused by the sudden change. But she got over it. As long as there was someone to look at her ass, she really didn't care who.

I look back at B as Anya wiggles her ass.

Buffy rolls her eyes.

Save it, An. You're wasting your time. She'll be looking at my ass soon enough.

I throw the next punch. I turn back around and give her my best strut.

I count.

One. Two. Three. Four...

Oomph!

And she's on the mat!

"Oow!" says Red, clutching her skull.

"Oh my god, sorry Willow!" Buffy says, holding her lip.

"I told you it was worth it, Xander," Anya smiles smugly. "I knew these pants would pay for themselves some day."

"Before you start, Willow, yes, I was looking where I was going, but I got something in my eye for a second," Buffy says quickly.

Yeah, like my ASS.

"Ya know what? I'm starting to think it would be safer if neither of you watches the 'rear'," Xander puns.

Anya sighs.

"Oh, alright, I'll do it. My ass seems to be a hazard to everyone but me. Xander's not to be trusted, and as for those two..." She looks at Red and T,"...well, I think we all know what I mean."

"Anya, I resent the implication that all lesbians would be attracted to your ass," Willow retorts, rubbing her head.

"Oh, did I do that? Sorry, I didn't mean all lesbians, I just meant you two..."

She thinks for a moment.

"...and Faith, of course. Oh, and Buffy now, too."

"What?? Anya, I am not a...I was so not looking at your ass!" Buffy huffs.

"You have a cut on your lip and Willow has a bump on her head," Anya says, pointing out the proof.

"Oh, come on, B. Come out, already. You can't be a closet Anya-Ass-Lover forever. Look at me. I'm all open about it...and I feel kinda proud too," I grin at her.

Anya tugs on Xander's sleeve, "I really like her, Xander. And she's so honest too."

Xander shakes his head.

"In fact, Xander. Remember that thing you always keep bringing up?" Anya says.

Xander's eyes go wide. He starts to blush.

"Uh, no, uh An-" he stammers, objecting.

"Oh, sure you do," Anya interrupts. "About bringing in another girl to be our orgasm buddy? Well, I think I'm ready now," she states happily looking at me.

Uh-oh.

"So, Faith," she continues, "What are your plans for tonight?"

Xander looks embarrassed...but he's not objecting now.

He's such a horn dog...I told you we understood each other.

"She's coming back to my house to help me fix my lip," Buffy says abruptly.

I look at her. I am?

"Yeah, Buffy. May...maybe Faith can kiss 'it' and make it better," teases Tara.

"Kiss what? What is Faith going to kiss of Buffy's to make it better?" Anya says irate, "I'm sorry, Buffy, but Xander and I saw her first, and she can kiss us and make it better."

Anya looks at me, "I know you've been with Xander, but you've never been with the both of us. Have you ever had an ex-vengeance demon? We can be very creative, can't we sweetie?"

She looks at Xander for confirmation.

"Um, An..." Xander says.

"Like the time we hooked the hose up to the bath and stuck it up your-"

"ANYA!" Xander yells. He puts his hand over her mouth.

"She has Turrets...excuse us, everybody," Xander leaves dragging Anya off again.

I raise an eyebrow.

"Well, that's the most interesting offer I've had in a while," I say smiling.

Buffy's not amused.

"Well, go after them then. Don't let my lip get in your way."

I grin at her.

"Nah, B. Your mouth needs attention. Besides, your lip would never get in my way."

"Oh my goddess. Does everything have to be about sex?" Red says exasperated.

"No..no, Willow, it doesn't have to be," Tara says turning away.

"Tara, no! That's not what I meant. I didn't mean you, baby," Red walks after her trying to explain.

Guess Red's not gettin' any tonight.

"Look what you started, Faith," Buffy says, turning away also.

I grab her elbow.

"What B? I didn't start anything. You were the one staring at Anya's ass."

"I was not looking at Anya's ass, Faith, and you know it."

"No? Then what were you looking at?" I ask her.

"I told you, I got something in my eye."

"Oh, that's right. You got 'something' in your eye."

"Quit it, Faith. I've got one nerve left, and you're on it."

"Fuck, B. I was just playin'."

"I'm tired. I'll see you tomorrow." She removes her elbow from my grip and heads over to hers.

"You don't need any help with that lip?" I call after her.

"No, I'll manage. I always have," she says, not turning around.

Well, this turned out all wrong.

Fuck 'em all. Well, except Tara, of course.

And I head back to mine.

I'm back in the tree.

Many hours have passed and I still can't get to sleep.

I found some chick and I got her off, but I wouldn't let her touch me. I just finger-fucked her in the alley by my motel.

I hope I didn't hurt her.

I went back upstairs hoping it had gotten out my aggressions, but it hadn't.

Fuckin' Buffy was still running through my mind.

She can sure dish it out when she wants...and she can usually take it.

But tonight was different. And normally it wouldn't bother me either, but again, tonight was different.

So I threw on some clothes and went to her house.

I've been sittin' in the tree for about a half hour now.

Buffy's lying in bed and I can hear soft music coming through her window. Which, by the way, she had left part way open. And the music was Enigma again.

She musta fallen asleep listening to it. I wonder if it reminds her of me?

I'm calmer now. Watching her sleep always does that for me.

But I'm still agitated. Something inside me feels unsettled.

And now I can't even have a smoke to relax me, cuz she's got her fuckin' window open.

I watch her for a few moments and then I find myself climbing onto her roof. I don't know why, and I really don't care. I just know I need to get closer.

I squat on the roof, my nose practically pressed against her window, when I see her stir. She looks at me and I stare back. She has a soft smile and she murmurs something, and then she sighs before turning away.

She's talking in her sleep.

That's so cute.

I wonder what she's saying?

The next thing I know, I'm climbing through her window and I'm sitting on her bed.

And I'm not even nervous.

I sit there for a while and then I begin to stroke her hair. She murmurs softly again and I hear her say my name.

I lean in closer to listen.

"Take off your mask, Faith..." she whispers.

My mask?

I lean in even closer. I put my ear to her lips and it brushes against it.

Her eyes open sleepily and I pull back slightly to look at her.

"Mmmm, better...but you can leave your cape on."

And then she kisses me...so I kiss her back.

I'm not stupid. We like sleeping Buffy, remember?

My tongue finds its way into her mouth and she moans.

Or was that me?

Whatever.

She's sighing and I'm moaning and she pulls back to look at my shirt.

"No fair," she mumbles. "I'm naked, you're not."

She's naked? I pull back the covers. Well, I guess she is...

Nice.

I start pulling off my clothes. I lean back in to kiss her every once in a while.

"Happy," she smiles softly, closing her eyes.

I give her one more kiss and then get up to make sure the door is locked. Don't need Joyce gettin' an eyeful.

I climb back into bed and take her in my arms. She melts into me.

She's so soft...and warm. My heart begins to race.

I allow my hands to become gently acquainted with her curves and my mouth regains possession of her lips again.

Regains possession. How lame, but that was exactly what it was doing. My kisses started out soft, but were now getting deeper, getting more heated. I moan into her again. I can't help myself.

I knew if I kept at it, I'd risk waking her up.

But it was a risk I was willing to take.

I roll her onto her back and crawl up on top of her, moving my hands to caress her nipples. I kiss her deeper...

...and feel her wake up.

Her light gasp into my mouth had alerted me and I opened my eyes to see her staring at me.

Those deep pools of green.

But I'm ready this time. I'm not gonna get sucked in.

I work my fingers into her hair and pull her head back, forcing her to look up at me.

Uh...um...okay.

Maybe a toe was in the water, but I swear, that's IT.

I feel her soft hands run up my sides and then down my back, caressing my hips and my ass. She pulls me closer and wraps her legs around me.

Locking me with her gaze, she moves against me. I can feel her soft pussy lips part beneath her pubic hair. She's rubbing herself on me, coating my stomach with her moisture.

I move my hand down to touch it.

I bring it back to my nose and inhale deeply before placing my fingers in my mouth. Buffy's eyes widen for a moment and then narrows again. She lifts her head to kiss me, sucking on my lips and on my fingers. We can both taste her pussy. So sweet.

I remove my fingers and lick her lips. I lower myself to take a nipple in my mouth; I suck and tease it with my tongue. She rubs harder against me. I reach down to still her, moving my mouth to her other breast before sliding under the covers and licking my way to her pussy. She groans. She puts her legs around my shoulders and then takes her fingers to spread herself for me. I suck on her fingers and lick at her clit. I put a finger inside and fuck her.

"Huuuunnhh....Faith," she whispers.

"Mmmmmmmm, Buffy," I moan back. I slip in another finger.

I lick and pump my fingers in and out of her slick opening.

Each stroke, each lick, each tremble causes more of her nectar to spill out. I don't usually talk like that, but that's what it is.

Nectar and Ambrosia. Food of the gods.

She made me feel like one.

She moves herself against my tongue, aiding me with her climax.

"Baby...Faith..." she gasps.

My clit twitches.

And I lick and fuck her until she slowly stops riding my face and gently pushes my head away.

She puts her hand in my hair and pulls me up by it.

She looks at me deeply and then kisses me with a groan.

She breaks the kiss and gives me a look. She slides underneath me, pulling down hard on my ass.

Fuck me, she's gonna lick me...Buffy Sex Fantasy # 3.

I quickly move forward on my knees, pulling myself upright and grabbing hold of her headboard. I look down as she stares up at me. Fuck. A thrill runs through me and I feel myself getting wetter. She feels this too, and opens her mouth to taste me.

She closes her eyes and eats me.

Lips, teeth, tongue.

Buffy's tongue is on my clit...Buffy's tongue is on my clit.

I grip the headboard tighter and throw my head back.

I groan, sliding against her mouth.

"Uhhhh...fuck, B..." I whisper.

She grips my ass with her hands, pulling me closer.

She licks and licks...and licks. I can't take it.

I'm gonna come.

I try to break away, but she holds my ass firmly. She quickly takes one hand and massages my breast and then pinches my nipple.

Oh fuck.

I come with a flood and she laps at it, licking me, drinking me in. I fall back down to rest on her face. I'm shaking.

She caresses my body, touching my breasts and rubbing my stomach. She slides her hands over my hips and pushes me up gently, sliding her head further down and licks at my pussy, then towards my ass. I jerk again slightly and then pull away.

I crawl under the covers and meet her at the foot of the bed.

She's wiping her chin and she's looking at me.

"I..." Love you, I think. But I catch myself.

" 'I' know," she says before kissing me.

BUFFY'S POV:

'She stole into my room
within the middle of the night

Softly we made love
before the early morning light...'

...and she was gone before the sunlight streaked the sky.

And here I was enveloped by the scent she left behind.

Everywhere.

Lingering on my sheets, on my hands, and on my lips.

She was everywhere. No, we were everywhere.

I could smell me too.

I think of our night, of our passion, and then some words began to form. I quickly reach under my pillow and jot a few sentences.

To feel the heat
of another one's skin

The wave of excitement
that builds from within

The scent of the passion
which fills up the room...

The heady aroma of carnal perfume.

--B. Summers 4/16

If it were possible, I'd bathe in this scent. I'd bottle this scent and spray it on liberally. I'd reek of Faith and Buffy.

It makes me feel like we were one. Another perfect moment.

And I pray she doesn't run away from me this time.

I close my eyes and touch myself.

I envision the Ferris wheel and our moment last night.

But if she does run away, I'll always have this.

It's not really enough...but it will have to be.

FAITH'S POV:

Buffy Sex Fantasy # 5.

She's on all fours and I'm rimming her ass from behind.

Except it's not a fantasy. I'm doing it now. It's a reality.

Just like BSF # 3, 4, 7, 8, 10, 13, 26 and 68 were.

In just five nights I've managed to actualize nine of the...hundred Buffy Sex Fantasies I've had over the years.

At this rate, I may have to come up with a few more in a couple of months.

If we're still doing it, that is.

If nothing fucks it up, that is.

Every morning it gets harder and harder for me to pull myself away from her. I need to be out before the sun comes up.

It's a deal that I made with myself.

Okay, we all know that I care about Buffy. And we all know how I feel about being pussy whipped.

Ain't gonna happen.

A pussy whipped person is the worst thing you could be.

At least it was where I came from. A pussy whipped person was really just a pussy. And a dick whipped girl was just plain stupid.

And I'm no pussy. And I've never been dick whipped either.

Well, there was this one guy that was really good at using his tool. It wasn't big either. He just knew how to use it.

But pussy whipped guys were just pathetic.

We'd all laugh and point at the former tough Southies who suddenly found their balls in their girl's handbag.

Asking permission to use them once in a while.

It damaged the rep of a lotta guys we looked up to.

Fuckin' pussy.

Yeah, it ruined more than a few of the heroes I had back then.

But it's not just in Boston. Pussy whipped is pussy whipped anywhere in the world. Just goes by a different name.

Pussy Whipped.

English: Pussy whipped.

Mandarin: Mao bian da

Portuguese: Bichano chicotes

French: Chatte soumise

South African Bushmen: Bawa (click click) tswa (click) pussy...

...or something like that.

But no matter what language you spoke, you knew it when you saw it.

Ugly, ugly, ugly. And just fucking humiliating, really.

Nope, not me. I'm gettin' me some pussy, but I ain't whipped.

"Ohhhh. Faith...God, I love how you do that," Buffy moans.

I know she does. And I love that she loves it.

I rim her ass and move my fingers inside her pussy. She leans back on me. I take my fingers out and slide one in her ass. I lick her asshole around it. I take my other hand and slip two fingers into her pussy, double penetrating her.

I go to town. She goes nuts.

She grabs a pillow and shoves her face into it, muffling her moans. The stereo is on, but it's soft. B's mom is sleeping, after all.

"Wo my ggwwaaa, Faffth...hhhnnnggff," she muffles loudly.

See? I'm a god.

I take out my fingers and flip onto my back, I position her hips so she sits on my face. I slip a finger back into her ass as I eat her.

She's gonna come again.

Second time tonight. I got her beat, though. Three times for me.

She bucks against my face and her hole clenches tight around my finger. I pull it out and lick her clit gently, bringing her down in measures.

She likes when I do that.

She slides herself backwards, leaving a wet trail on my body with her pussy. Down my chin, my breasts, and then onto my stomach. She stops when her head is right above mine.

"I love you," she says.

And then she kisses me.

She loves me.

She loves me, and my heart almost leaps out of my chest when I hear those words.

She loves me.

And I wrap my arms around her, holding her tight.

I fuckin' love you too.

BUFFY'S POV:

"I love you." I said, looking deep into her eyes.

And then I kissed her.

I felt her heart beating hard against my chest and her arms wrap around my back, bringing me closer.

I said it. I told her. And she's still here.

She runs her fingers through my hair and she moans into my mouth.

"Buffy..." she says. "Buffy...I..."

And my heart stops, waiting for her to finish the sentence. The silence is heavy.

She pulls back suddenly and I feel it.

Faith has left the building and I was alone again.

Tears form in my eyes before she can even speak. She looks up at me and then blinks as a tear lands in her eye.

She gently pushes me up, then wipes at her eyelid.

"Buffy, I have to go," she says looking at me.

And I'm looking back. I'm looking right back at her and I'm crying.

I'm not even trying to hide it. She runs her thumb across my cheek, wiping at the stream that won't stop flowing.

"Buffy, please don't cry," she says softly.

"Faith, please don't go," A small sob escapes me.

She looks at me sadly. She seems so torn. She finally gets up and says:

"I have to."

"Why?" I ask desperately, looking at her back. "Why do you have to go? Why do you keep running away from me?"

And she turns around and looks over my shoulder.

"Because of that."

The poems and her picture were out in the open. I had moved the pillow to muffle my moans when she had been loving me.

"Why? Because it's proof that I love you? That I've always loved you?"

"Yeah, B. That's why."

"That doesn't make sense, Faith. Maybe it did back then, but we're older now. We can handle it now. I thought you loved me too?"

I know in my heart that she does, but it came out as a question. Because maybe I was wrong. Maybe it was just sex for her. Maybe I was alone the entire time.

"I do, B. That's the whole point." She turns back around and starts dressing herself. She looks at me and says:

"Don't you get it, Buffy? We love each other. And that can only screw things up. I can love you and not have sex with you or I can have sex with you and not love you. I can't do both."

"Weren't you doing that anyway? How does it change things just because I said it out loud?"

"I don't know, B. It just does. It may not make sense to you, but it does to me. I think I was skirting around the issue, cuz the sex was just so fucking good and I didn't want to give it up."

"If that's supposed to be a compliment, Faith, it sure doesn't feel like one."

She laughs. It's a wise-ass laugh.

"Yeah? Well, it should. Do you know how many girls are missing out cuz I've been spending all my time with you?"

Did she really just say that?

I watch her as she pulls on her socks. She's looking for her boots, but she can't find them. She sighs and walks over to the window and looks at me.

"Did you hear me, Buffy? I said you should take it as a compliment, cuz I've been spending every night with you. People don't usually get seconds with me. Let alone eighths and ninths. You should feel really lucky."

She looks out into the night and laughs.

"Yeah, B. For a while there I'd be gettin' off some girl and then coming over here to sit in your tree. Just watching you sleep and getting all soft inside. How pathetic."

She turns back around and her face is emotionless.

"Take off your mask, Faith," I tell her.

"I don't know what you're talking about, Buffy. This isn't a mask, this is me. Isn't this the person you fell in love with? Or maybe it was 'The mask' you were in love with before. The way you wanna see me."

She snorts.

She snorted at me?

She sees the look on my face and she panics a little.

Yeah, you better panic.

"Uh, but hey...I mean, we both like the sex, and I have no problem with you lovin' me and all. You know, as long as you can keep it in perspective. I don't see why we can't keep doing this from time to time. I mean, not exclusively or anything, cuz I gotta be making my rounds again. I mean, the next time I eat at a restaurant I might not bite into anything but my burger."

She laughs, jokingly.

She's joking with me? And mentioning other girls? And she has 'no problem' with me loving her if I keep it in 'perspective'?

And she's mentioning food? Where the fuck did that come from??

"Get out," I tell her.

"What?"

"I said get out. Take your Romeo self and get the fuck out of my room."

"Whooa, B. You don't gotta be gettin' all mad at me and shit. I'm just trying to be honest here."

"You haven't been honest yet, Faith."

"Sure I have, B. I mean, sorry if I sound a little harsh, but we both know we're into the fucking. If you can keep it all in perspective, I see no reason why we can't keep doing this."

"Occasionally," she adds quickly.

"No, Faith. There is no 'occasionally' for us. I want all or nothing. I've lived long enough without it, believe me. I'm not going to settle for less now."

"Yeah, but that was different, B. Angel and you couldn't have sex again, and that fuck-face Riley probably wasn't even worth it. I think I am."

"I wasn't talking about them, I was talking about us. And why are you still here anyway? I said get out."

She stands there.

"I said get out!!"

"Shit, B. You're gonna wake your mom up with that mouth."

"Shut YOUR mouth and go!"

She smiles at me.

"I can't, B. I can't find my boots."

Yeah? Well, I know where they are. Where I hid them.

I go to my bureau and pull out her boots.

She looks at me amused.

"Hmm, now why didn't I know to look there?" she asks playfully.

Fuck her. She can't pretend this is okay.

I throw a boot at her. It goes out the window.

"Damn, B. Good thing your aim is better in bed."

I throw the other one at her and it bounces off her head before following the other boot outside.

"Fuck you, Faith."

She looks at me, rubbing her head.

"No, fuck YOU, Buffy."

And with her mask on, she slips angrily out of the window.

THE MIDDLE

FAITH'S POV:

It's my fault.

I let this shit get out of hand, so it's really my fault.

I don't blame her for falling in love with me.

I mean, it kinda surprised me, sure, but when you think about it, why wouldn't she fall in love with me?

I'm good lookin', got a killer body, and I sure as fuck know how to use it too. I may not be the sharpest tool in the shed, but I'm not as dumb as a bucket of hair either.

Plus, she's a silly romantic girl.

Those poems and the picture of me under her pillow.

Can you be any more girlie?

But I guess that's one of the things I like best about her.

The clink and the clang...or is that the yin and the yang?

Whatever.

But you put the two of us together and we sure made some noise.

I love the way she sounds when I make love to her.

No, I mean I like the way she sounds when I do it to her.

But she's history now. Just like all the others. Easy 'come', easy go.

Hey, another good motto. But I guess "get some, get gone" means the same thing.

Little fucking Buffy....well, I guess I won't be anymore.

Her loss.

I pick up the pace and head to the bar. It's too soon to go home. I'd just be thinkin' about her warm sheets while I was lying in my cold bed.

But if I get real wasted, I'll pass out cold. It won't matter how cold my bed is.

Yeah, that's the plan. Let's get wasted.

By the time I get over to Giles', everyone was already there.

Not that I expected any different. I was two hours late and severely hung over.

I almost decided to skip it, but then I didn't want Buffy to think I was avoiding her. Fuck no. Nothing wrong here. It was MY decision to end it. The love part. The fucking part was her idea.

So I stroll in, shading my eyes with my sunglasses, and everyone goes quiet. Hmmm.

Usually everyone keeps talking, like they didn't even notice me.

I glance at the room and I see Xander looking at me, kinda like he's disappointed. Willow and Tara are sitting next to Buffy and both are holding her hand. She's not crying now, but her eyes look a little puffy and she's got like twenty snot rags in front of her and two boxes of tissues.

"Ah, um...Faith," Giles says clearing his throat, "We decided not to have a meeting today, so if you feel like leaving that would be perfectly acceptable." Everyone is looking at me. Red looks pissed and T looks so sad.

I pull up my shades and squint.

"Why?"

"Why?? Why??" Anya trills from the other room. She comes back in holding another box of Kleenex.

"I'll tell you why. Your pathetic little stunt practically crippled poor Buffy. She may be a Slayer, but inside she's mush. You're as bad as some of the men I've had to punish. No, in some cases you're worse. You're a woman for god's sake, Faith. How could you do this to another woman? I swear, if I were still a vengeance demon, I'd slap you with your own tongue."

I raise an eyebrow and grin.

"Is that before or after you'd use it on your ass?"

"After, of course, but that's not the point. We all know of your reputation; Xander just told us about your problem at the local restaurants."

I shoot Xander a look. He looks right back at me and shrugs.

"Yeah, so?" I pretend to stifle a yawn.

"Oh, let me at her, Tara. Let go of my arm!" I hear Red say.

I look over and Red is struggling to get out from Tara's grasp. She's looking at me, and fuck, she's scaring the shit out of me!

"Wait your turn, Willow. I'm not done talking yet," Anya says.

"Hey, now wait a second," I say, putting up my hands.

"No, you get to shut up. I think you had plenty to say last night. Didn't she Buffy?" Anya asks.

Buffy doesn't respond.

"See? You made her mute. When was the last time you heard Buffy say nothing? Never. I should make you mute too, by yanking out that tongue of yours. Sure, you may not be able to pleasure the girls, but you won't be causing more pain either."

"Hey, An...look, I get it. But I thought you said you really liked me, and that I was so honest and stuff. I was just being honest."

Red struggles some more and I look closely to make sure T's got a good grip on her. Tara notes this, and I see her lift up two fingers, loosening her hold on Red's arm. Oh shit, she's pissed at me too.

"I meant you were being so honest about my ass. You know, Faith, you really should have come home with us that night. We could have had fun and no one would have gotten hurt. Neither Xander nor I are in love with you."

"Well, just sex then, right? Then why is it that I'm being colored such the bad guy here, when that's all I was trying to do with Buffy?" I wince, cuz I know that was mean.

I look over at T and she's lifted another finger up. Fuck, she can't hold onto a pissed off witch with only two fingers!

"Because we all would have known going into it. You knew Buffy was in love with you and you did it anyway. That's what predators do, Faith. Molesters. They take advantage of someone's weakness."

She's right. I did know. I saw the picture and read the poem.

"I'm sorry," I say.

"Don't tell me, tell her," Anya replies nodding in B's direction.

"I'm sorry," I then say to Red.

"Oh my goddess, Tara, let go of me now!" And she does.

She may be a bad-ass witch, but I'm still a Slayer. I fuckin' spun on my heels and got the hell outta there.

I ran until my lungs hurt. I ran past the motel, cuz I knew she'd come looking for me there...

Where can I go? Where can I hide out?

And then a thought occurs to me.

Betty.

Riiiight.

When I got to Betty's, she was just coming in with some bags of groceries. She was struggling to open the lock and balance the bags. I walk up and take them from her.

She looks at me, surprised.

"Hey there, 'B'. How ya been?"

She opens the lock and looks closer at me.

"Are you drunk?" she asks.

"Hell no. A little hung over, maybe."

"Where you at the Bronze last night? I was bartending and I didn't see you."

"Yeah, I was there. What, you didn't feel me eye-balling you?" I lie.

"No, I didn't. But that's not where you got drunk, cuz I was the only bartender on last night."

"No, you're right, I got drunk someplace else. I just stopped by to see you was all," I lie again.

"Why didn't you come up?"

"Well, seeing as you were the only bartender there, you looked pretty busy, so I left you alone."

I'm assuming it was busy. She just said she was the only one there, right?

"Oh god, it was a mad-house. You're not kidding me."

Well, actually I was, but that's okay.

"Yeah, so I figured I'd see you afterwards, like today. Besides, we can spend more time together this way," I smile at her.

She smiles back and leans in to kiss me.

"I've missed you. Why didn't you call?"

"Let's not get into that, I'm here now, aren't I?" I push open the door.

I walk inside with the groceries and there is some schmo sitting on the couch drinking a beer and watching TV.

In his scivvies.

"Relative?" I ask her, raising a brow.

"Boyfriend. Ex," she replies.

"Really, from how long ago?"

"From right now," she says. "Get your lame ass off of my sofa and out of my apartment. And take your worthless things with you."

He looks up, "Oh, is this that dyke you've been moaning about all week?"

"Yeah, that's me, so get your ass up or I'll do it for you."

"You may have to, Faith. He's too lazy to do anything for himself."

"I see that. He hears you struggling at the front door and he can't get up to help you?"

"Hey, I have a bad back. Tell her, Betty."

"He was playing Frisbee-golf and tried to get fancy," she drolls.

Frisbee-golf? Are you kidding me?

I put down the groceries.

"Okay, get up, pal. And MOVE it, or I'll align that spine right up for you."

And for an injured guy, he's remarkably fast. We watch him scurry through the apartment, getting dressed and collecting his things. He's out of the door in less than three minutes.

"Where'd you find him, B?" I ask her.

"Don't ask," she says.

Okay.

"Are you hungry? Can I get you something to eat?" she asks.

Oh god. Buffy. The original B.

I feel a pang and I can't stand it.

"Nah, not right now. I feel like taking a nap. Come with me?"

"Every time," she says sexily.

I grin. See? This might not be so bad.

I take hold of her hand and pull her into the bedroom.

I'm in the fucking tree again.

After Betty took off for work, I swung by a few cemeteries.

I dusted some vamps and then took off each time I heard the gang approach. They probably wondered why there was barely anything around to kill. Except for Buffy, of course. She would know I had been there and had probably sensed me too. I sensed her long before I actually heard the gang approaching. But I knew I had some time, so I dusted a few to work off my tension.

But now I was horny.

And it's funny how you can have sex all day, and even have good sex all day, and yet you're still not satisfied. Gotta be the right person, I guess.

Like the girl in the bed in front of me.

She's gotta be wicked horny. We'd been fucking like bunnies for days. I even got some today and I was still horny.

Out of impulse, I find myself tapping on her window. It was shut tight and I noticed that the lock was latched.

What? Did she think I'd climb up on her roof and let myself in?

Okay, so actually I did. That's how I noticed the lock was latched.

I see her turn slowly in the bed and look at me. We stare at each other for a long time. It seems like she's waiting for something. I want to draw a little heart with a stake through it like that time in high school, but I knew that would just be leading her on. So instead I did the next best thing.

I made my hand into a fist and poked my finger back and forth into it. You know, the old in-and-out.

She stares at me a moment longer and then turns her back to me.

What? Was that wrong?

I've always done it before with great results.

She's just weird.

I jump back down and head back to Buffy's...I mean, Betty's.

Fuck, just B.

After a few more nights of staying at B's and patrolling alone, I venture back to my place. I had been wearing B's clothes for a few days. She likes the same stuff as I do. I can't imagine what I'd have been wearing if I was at the real B's house.

No, I know.

Boring, boring, dull, really boring, butt-ugly and my leather jacket.

But I figured it was safe now, since Red didn't come find me with a locating spell or something. Plus, Buffy must not have told them that I was tapping on her window every night.

I figured out the finger in the fist thing was not the way to go with her, but still she wouldn't open the window for me. But I know she wanted to. I could see the heat in her eyes when she looked at me.

She's just playing hard-to-get. I can hold out. She'll want it as bad as I do pretty soon.

I'm sure of it.

I run into Xander at the Espresso Pump. He was loading up on Latte's for Anya. The girl is addicted and needs several fixes a day. I guess he wised up and started getting her four at a time. I wonder if he thought about decaf. No need to have a jumpy ex-vengeance demon on your hands.

I wait for him as he comes through the door.

"Hey, Xan," I say casually.

"Oh, hi, Faith," he says looking away.

"What? You can't even look at me now?" I ask sarcastically.

"No, Faith, I can't. Cuz a look of disgust might cross my face and then you'll just slap it right off me," But he says this looking me dead in the eye.

"Disgust, huh? Pretty strong word for the small crime that I've done."

"That's where you're wrong, Faith. It wasn't a small crime, it was grand larceny."

"I didn't steal Buffy's heart, Xander."

"No, you're right. She gave it to you, and you laughed at her."

"No I didn't," I lie.

"Yes you did, Faith. Out of all of us, I think I know how you work the best. I've not only heard things, but you've told me so yourself. You toy with people and then you leave. You're good at that."

"So? You always liked my stories, Xan. You were always saying 'tell me another one', remember?"

"Yeah, and I was a jerk for doing it. You know, living with an ex-vengeance demon should have taught me a lot about scorned women. About how they got that way. God knows Anya has told me enough examples. But it wasn't until I saw someone do it to Buffy that I got the whole vengeance thing. The whole why thing. You've made me reconsider the concept."

"Hey, glad I could help you straighten out a few things," I joke.

"It's not funny, Faith. But go ahead and laugh. That's what you're so good at."

"Don't you think you're taking this to the extreme, Xander? Fuck, you're a horn dog too. I was just gettin' some."

"Shut up, Faith. You know Buffy is different. Before you got some with her, you thought so yourself. Always questioning her choice in men and why she couldn't be more casual about it. You knew it was never just about sex with her. But you did it anyway, and now you're complaining about it because you got caught."

"Whatever, Xander. Think what you want."

"I will. And now I have to go or these Latte's will get cold."

He turns to leave and I say:

"Whipped," I don't even bother coughing it into my hand.

He turns back to look at me. He's got a smile on his face.

"That's right. I'm a big ole pile of whipped cream for my girl and I love it. I love it and she loves it. And we're happy. Is that what this is about, Faith? Some lesbian machismo thing? Look, you can kick my ass, but I'll still be more of a man than you'll ever be. And it's not cuz I have a dick either. It's because I can admit that I'm pussy whipped. And if that makes me a pussy, then so be it. Isn't that what you think of me? That I'm a pussy? Well, I'd rather be a pussy in love than an ass all alone."

Everybody's words keep gnawing at me. Buffy's words, Anya's words, Xander's words, Betty's words. The words in my own fucking head.

Just gnawing at me.

I had just gotten home from Buffy's house. Her roof to be exact. And like the last six nights, I tapped at her window.

Fuck, she's taken this playing-hard-to-get thing too far.

I saw the same heat in her eyes as before. Like the same way they've looked for the past six nights. No, scratch that. Like every night I've been with her and every night since then.

Why isn't she giving in? It's driving me fucking crazy.

And I stopped coming around Betty's.

She's already got a new boyfriend/girlfriend, I'm not sure what it is, but she hooked up with it after I told her I couldn't see her anymore. I felt I had to, cuz she had been so good to me and all. I didn't want to run out on her like the last time.

"Why, Faith?" she had asked.

"Because I'm in love with someone else," I admitted the truth.

"Then why aren't you with her?" she asked.

"I don't really know," I lied that time.

"Well, that's pretty pathetic, and I want you to take your lame ass and get out of my apartment."

I grinned.

"Damn, that sounds kind of familiar," I said.

She sighed.

"Yeah, I know. You've only heard me say it twice, but trust me, I've said it too many times to count."

I kissed her softly on the cheek.

"You'll get it right someday," I told her.

"Yeah, but will you?" she said.

So now I'm upstairs in my motel room, pretty much feeling like an ass and feeling alone. Just like Xander said.

And I felt whipped, too. My ass got whipped good.

So I got to thinkin'.

Thinkin' about all the feelings I had and the images that keep going through my mind.

Of Buffy. Of me and Buffy. Of us.

So I grab a pen and start scribbling on the back of a take-out bag and I begin pouring out my guts. If Buffy could do it, then why couldn't I? Well....

I get up to go find that old dictionary that someone had left here. It was propping up my bureau. I slide it out and replace it with a dented coke can.

After two hours, I got it all out.

Trying to form my words and then looking them up in the dictionary. It wasn't as easy as I thought it would be. Because half way through writing it, I knew I wanted to give it to Buffy. So it had to be perfect.

It was mostly about sex. Actually, it was all about sex.

But did you really expect any different from me?

At least this way Buffy will know I wrote it. Anything else, and she might have doubted it. No, this was pure me.

And I tried to stay away from offensive imagery. No fist poking fingers in this one.

This is what I wrote:

MISSING YOU

I long to feel that one sensation:
Red hot heat of stimulation
Brings to mind consideration...
You and me in copulation
Picking up some old vibrations
velvet lips in osculation, to feel your hips in slow rotation
makes me throb with such pulsation
soaking wet with lubrication...
Always in my expectations
you give me such titillation
when we touch it's scintillation
makes me yearn for consummation...
But when I lay with some stagnation
I won't feel the deep frustration
of thinking it's just imitation
for there I'd just give limitation
to further thoughts of concentration
For I do have one consolation-
These thoughts work for masturbation...

F.

I didn't put the date, because even though I wrote it tonight I'd been feeling that way for days. I tear the bag carefully, working my way around the poem.

It is a poem, right? A smutty poem, but it's still a poem. I think I'll keep that dictionary handy. I kinda like it. I fold the paper carefully and then tuck it in my shirt. I don't want my ass to crease it. I throw on a jacket and fly down the stairs. I stop at the old lady's house who prides herself with her rose bushes and I snag me one.

Hey, it's her own damn fault. If you value you something, keep it under lock and key. Nah, I'd have gotten to it anyway, even if that had been the case.

I get to B's house and I scale the tree. I quietly jump onto the roof. Like I said, practice makes perfect. I'd be a damn fine cat burglar.

I look at my sleeping Buffy. My sleeping Beauty.

And I want to kiss her and wake her up.

But I can't, cuz I blew it and her window is locked.

And for the first time I realized why it bothered me so much. Why it hurt me so much.

Why it meant so damn much.

She had locked up her heart and was keeping me out.

My eyes began to burn as the tears welled up. Not the kind of natural lubricant I had in mind. And aren't tears supposed to feel soothing? Or at least not burning? Mine felt like battery acid pooling in my eyes. I blink and wipe them away.

I take the rose and slip the stem between the folds of the poem. I wedge the paper into her window sill. I wedge it in tight, in case there's a breeze. I look at her and I kiss the pane. It leaves a dark lip print like the one placed on the poem.

I tap on the window and then jump to the ground.

I look back up and whisper:

"Wake up, Buffy."

And I haul my sorry ass down the street.

BUFFY'S POV:

I hear tapping again.

But I've been hearing it all night, so at first I didn't bother to look. The first time I heard it, it was Faith at the window.

Just like the other six nights. And each time I saw her there I almost got up to let her in. Her face looked so sad and so full of longing. But the first night she came she pissed me off. Being crude with her hand gestures. She really knows how to sweep a girl off her feet.

Well, she really does, actually.

But the timing was inappropriate, and she was inappropriate, so I turned my back on her. But each night she came back and I gave her another chance. I waited for the right move or the right look or the right gesture. I wasn't sure what it would be, but I knew I would recognize it if I saw it.

But I hadn't seen any.

So we'd stare at each other for a while and then I'd finally turn away. Go away, I'd think.

You still don't get it.

But tonight I'd continue to hear tapping off and on even when she wasn't there. I was hoping, I guess. I'm still good at that. I turned to look and instead of seeing nothing I see something wedged in the sill. I got up to look at it and I see a rose in some paper and some lip prints on my window.

She was here. She came back.

I open the window carefully, so as not to dislodge the paper. I grab it quickly and then close the window again. A white rose stuck between a grease stained note. Another kiss print on the back of it. I bring it to my bed and reach under my pillow for the penlight. I unfold the paper and it's not a note. It's a poem. I scan down quickly to see if there is an author.

F.

Faith wrote something? I don't mean to sound belittling, but I've barely even seen her doodle let alone write something.

I start at the top. MISSING YOU, it said. And I read.

After reading it over and over, I came to the conclusion that this was a love poem to Faith. Yes, it's all about sex, but it was sex she pictured having with me, and she obviously put a lot of thought and time behind it.

She's not so quick to call it a fuck now.

Maybe her heart got the better of her mouth this time.

It's still not exactly what I wanted, but I have to consider the source. This was big for her. It meant something to her.

And I know I mean something to her even though she wrote only about sex.

Sex with me. Sex together. Sex between us.

If she doesn't screw anything up between now and tomorrow night, I'll consider leaving my window open.

But she probably will. She always does.

Faith didn't show for the meeting, cuz none of us did.

It was another free day, and I roamed around town looking for her. I didn't let on to what I was doing, of course, I just told Will and Tara that I wanted to go window-shopping and have lunch. But I didn't see her anywhere.

Which is good, I guess. If I didn't see her, then there was less chance of her screwing it up. I say less chance, cuz with Faith, she doesn't always have to be there to screw things up.

But nothing did, so after patrolling a few places that I could sense she had been, I got ready for bed and opened my window.

Just a crack.

If she wants it bad enough, she'll have to climb up and look.

I wait.

About a half hour later I hear a scratching sound on the roof.

Her boots with the gravel in the treads. She's not as quiet as she thinks.

I look at her as she notices the window is open. She looks surprised, but then smiles. She looks at me and then places her hand under the wood and then lifts up. I guess she knew it was an invitation or else she didn't care.

Either way, she was now in my room and shutting the window behind her. She looks at me for a good long minute and then approaches the bed slowly.

She looks at my nightstand with her rose in a vase. Next to it is her poem with her picture on top of it.

She comes to my side and then kneels on the floor.

She reaches to me and then takes my hand into hers.

"I love you," she says, "And I'm sorry."

"Do you want to be with me?" I ask. I'm not playing around.

It's either yes or get out.

"Yes," she says, and she wipes at her eye.

Are those tears? Well, I'm not budging.

"For how long?"

For what? For like a day, or a week, or a month?

"Forever."

And she finally says the right thing.

FAITH'S POV:

"Yeah baby, I'll hold your purse for you."

Xander is grinning at me as I make a fool of myself.

"Oh, and these too," Buffy says, piling bags into my arms.

I'm peering over the ton of shit that Buffy loaded onto me and I see the rest of the gang grinning too.

Fuck 'em. I'm happy.

"And Faith, don't slouch."

Don't slouch. Then why are you piling all this shit on me? She's lucky I'm not bent over in half.

"Faith," she says, looking at me.

"Okay, baby," And I straighten my spine. I swear I heard it crack.

"Oh, she's PW'd alright," says Anya, fussing with Xander's shirt.

"Yeah, she is," Xander smiles.

"And if she keeps watching you, she'll learn from the best," Anya says before slapping his ass. She follows Buffy behind a dressing room curtain.

He does an exaggerated jump and then scowls at me. But I know he's kidding. I can see a little smile to the corners of his lips.

"She's not PW'd," says Tara, "She...she's in love."

I love that fuckin' T.

"God bless ya, baby," I say.

"Goddess," corrects Red. She looks smugly at me.

"What's with the face, Red? I wouldn't be so quick to exclude yourself. Last I remember you were getting shut down. Have you been earning a little 'pussy, Willow'?"

"I swear it's always about sex with you," She shuts up quickly, looking at Tara.

"Yeah, Red. I'd re-think that if I were you. Remember the last time you said that? Well, that's what I was referring to."

Tara looks at Willow. Willow puts her arm around Tara and snuggles in close. She whispers in her ear.

"No, baby. Not the 'big chill' okay? I was just playing with Faith. I'm just kidding."

"I know, Willow. Could you please hold on to these for me? I want to try on some clothes with Buffy," Tara gives Red a quick kiss and then piles her shit on top of her.

The three of us look at each other.

"Better a pussy in love..." says Xander.

"...than an ass all alone." I finish for him.

We start laughing.

Red looks quickly over her shoulder, watching for Tara, and then says:

"I swear it's always about sex with you!"

"We heard that," Sing-song three voices from behind the curtain.

Bichano chicotes

Mao bian da

Chatte soumise

Bwa (click click) tswa (click) pussy

Pussy whipped

That's me.

THE END